The weeks over the Christmas & New Year period can always be that little more stressful, and this year I found it more so than in previous years. In the few weeks prior to Christmas I had been suffering with Vertigo and this had made me feel quite queasy at times and for some reason very vulnerable. Without any reason to do so, I felt a sort of insecurity and overemotional.
Thankfully, I only had to take tablets only for two or three weeks to combat the Vertigo.
I guess that because of this, there was a lot of tension in my body and at times I had terrific pains in my neck that would travel down into my shoulder and the top of my good arm. It was a miserable time and one that I have now overcome without prescription medication but with the help and encouragement from my husband.
I acknowledge that I have found it difficult over these weeks to be now going into a third new year without fully regaining the use of my right arm or hand. I remain resolute that "I will not be beaten" and try even harder to overcome the obstacles.
I attended the Botox clinic on December 22nd and we agreed that as my hand and fingers are still quite loose, that no Botox would be given at that time and I next go on February 2nd. I can still do a finger spread and maintain for a while and I can also rotate my hand from the wrist so the palms face upwards.
I have also been practicing getting hold of objects and can now actually get hold of things as you would expect and not "backwards" as I was previously.
I have an appointment at the Hospital Eye Clinic later in January for another Visual Fields test and to check the pressure. Depending on the latter result, I may have to be prescribed drops.
My friends and acquaintances tell me, "that I am coming on in leaps and bounds" and I am, but how I would love to be able: to clip my own toe nails, walk down a full flight of stairs one foot in front of the other, get in and out of a bath without assistance, drive, make a full meal but most of all be able to stretch and hold out my right arm.
Let's see what progress I make with regard to all of these in this next year.
Happy New Year!
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking a lot about how we think about progress of late, and about Xeno's Paradox of Achilles and the Tortoise [1] (bear with me, I'll start making sense in a minute!).
If we think in terms of our progress from where we started, it can seem a simpler and rosier picture - progress is clear. If we think about our intended end point, the picture is somehow more complicated and less happy. I think this is because the closer we are to our end point the more clearly we can see the progress yet to be made, whereas the further we are from our start point the more we overlook what has been acheived so far.
In the paradox, Achilles apparently cannot catch the tortoise because when he has run to where the totoise /was/, the tortoise has already moved on - minutely. The flaw in the paradox is that it examines ever smaller increments of time, just as the flaw in our perception is that we can see ever more detail in what we have to acheive.
I'm not being very articulate today, but what I'm trying to say is that the journey ahead, being the road not yet travelled, is intimidating - but looking behind at the journey so far helps me maintain some perspective and stay positive.
I hope that 2012 is good for you, and that you can tick off as much of your list of objectives as possible by the end of it!
[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zeno's_paradoxes#Achilles_and_the_tortoise